I came across a discussion on the girl friend experience and the whole arena of men booking professional escorts for intimacy and companionship. You can read their discussion on the girl friend experience here. The author and his readers seemed to have more questions than answers about the whole set up. The fact that a man (or woman) isn't paying for sex, but is paying for intimacy with no complications or pressure-cooked pets seems to be more than some people can comprehend.
When a man picks up a half drunk lady at a singles bar and takes her home to sleep with her, she doesn't love him either. Or if she professes she does, she's probably a bunny boiler and in the long run could cost him more than he could have ever dreaded paying for companionship.
As an escort, I am motivated to give each client the best sexual experience within my capabilities. The difference between a bread and butter sandwich, or an exotic baguette with the most delicious fillings. Yes, the money motivates me to give the guy an experience with him that will make him tingle and smile any time he remembers it. I'm not charging peanuts and don't want him feeling he got peanuts.
Sure a man can get sex for free if he tries hard enough. But he has less bargaining power. He is hoping the lady he bags for nothing will be happy to give him a blow-job. He'll be hoping she can give a half decent blow-job, and isn't one of the clueless ladies whose teeth seem busier than the tongue during a blow-job. Will she provide anal? Chances are no, she will not. And he has no right to expect nor demand it, not in the same way that a client expects it from a lady that advertises that she offers anal.
So he spends his life chatting up everything in a skirt. And most will hopefully realise that he isn't chatting with her for her personality, but because he's trying his chances. If women could read what goes on in a man's mind when he's chatting her up, more of us would charge them. Hardly a day goes by that I don't regret waiting until I was in my thirties before entering this profession.
He doesn't have to do a song and dance routine to woo a woman into bed. He's entitled to an obvious pre-agreed conclusion to our assignation in a way that a man chatting me up by chance is not. A client has picked me out of hundreds of options of other intimate services providers. I don't want him regretting that choice. I'm also hoping that what he experiences will be so good that he'll want to book me again. A repeat visit is all the praise one needs, apart from being good for business.
A client emailed me today and the last sentence in his email made me smile.
"You still give me a lovely warm feeling when I think about you!"
And that made me feel even better than usual about being a professional escort. I don't remember any boy-friend in the past saying that about me. So maybe as an escort, I put more effort into intimate meetings than I would a "free" encounter. In fact, I know that for a fact.
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Wow, Pru. First off, thank you for reading my post. :) One thing I
consider when reading the comments on GAFC is that the "regulars" are all
around the same age... Twenty-one to twenty-six-or-so. None have ever
been married. There may be a dearth of life experience there, or at least
a shortage of variety. I find as I get older that reality assaults my
idealism on many matters, including male-female relations.
Interesting post. yes karen so much in the 'normal' world which is really
prostitution, and is quite acceptable, as long as it's not called
'prostitution'.
And to let you know as a linker I’m re-writing my story NEW
AGE HARLOT starting <a href=http://newageharlot.blogspot.com/2005/09/new
-new-age-harlot-story-im-telling.html> here </a>. Hope you like.
I didn't say why I don't pay for sex (and similar) in the comments to the
referenced article: I want the ego-kick from knowing that it's somebody
that wants me, rather than wanting my money. (I don't pay in the form of
drinks etc either - I may pay drinks/drugs/food/whatever for friends, but
in any sexual relationship I expect it to mostly balance.)